Around the World in 80 names...

I guess at some point, people got tired of using names from the continental United States as in Dakota, Montana, California Cherry, Indiana, Alabama Gypsy Rose, Memphis Eve, New York [you can thank that god awful show Flavor of Love for that mess...one moment please..Shudder...]

I'm just waiting for the name Shenandoah to start cropping up. Oh dear. That actually has a nice ring to it.

Where was I? Oh Yeah. Now, it appears that we have crossed the seas and incorporated not just other continents, but anything and everything related to travelling.

Please observe:-
Ireland
Paris [I know of someone who named her child Paris...after her cat who had passed away. Umm, okay...]
London
Asia
India
Melbourne
China-Sometimes spelt Chyna.WHY??!!

A feasible method for naming children.

Now, in actuality, these are quite pretty, however the scales get tipped with the following names:-
Journey-Not the band...but just one little kid
Zahara -Wait hold on. I was thinking about Sahara
Jeronimo-Sorry, sounds like something good to say before starting a trip
Mars Merkaba
Ocean
Pirate
Saffron Sahara- I knew there was a desert name in here somewhere...
Sailor Lee
Tripp -Priceless!!! I couldn't have asked for anything better...

Name your child Pirate, you must not.

My favorite in this category is a family who thought they were being cute. Not so much.

Okay. Their last name is Hall. They named the child, Tajma. Yes folks.
Her whole name is Tajma Hall.

This...is the real Taj Mahal

Wheel of Fortune...Can I Buy a Vowel Please?

There are some folks who were under the impression that you had to BUY a vowel before it could be added into a name and I truly believe that they think there was a crazy, buy one, get one sale on the least used consonants.

"Pat? Can I buy a vowel, please?"

Sadly, some of these names defy all phonics, logic and any of the ever changing current reading methods that the school system deems appropriate.

If you can figure out how to actually pronounce some of these names, give yourself a gold star.

 I stopped trying.

Jermih -pronounced Jerimiah.
Yes, I know vowels are missing. The 'mother' was informed by many individuals that this was spelt incorrectly. However, in her world...this is how Jerimiah is spelt.

I weep for our youth.

Jermih Jahein-Kareem  Yes, it's the above kids first and middle name. Double sigh. Where do I start?! I would totally understand if there was a religious and cultural background to this name. BUT...there wasn't!! The poor kid is already on the TSA [Transportation Security Administration] watch list and he hasn't even left the hospital!!!

"Excuse me sir. Can you come over here, please?
 Where are you travelling to and why? I'm sorry, Sir. I can't understand you.
Please speak clearly!!"

Here are some more doozies:-

Rva- a girl
Nekeya-both a boy and a girl
Toriano-boy
Shedie-boy
Tshombe -a guy
Yanique -a girl
Nekey -no idea if this is a boy or girl
Osamani -And before you think that this is a culturally based name. It isn't.
Treleah-For some reason I feel like skipping when I read this name
Sirandre- I no longer care if it's a boy or girl
Calaiyah
Yaquan
Shaqul
Taqul
Anielka
Laquan
Quantaz -Bonus points for using Q and Z in a name. Pity he can't use it in Scrabble. Darn!!
Zenia pronounced Xena [oh, to use Xena's Chakram on some of these parental units]

Xena and her multipurpose Chakram.
Oh, the sense I could knock into heads with that thing!!

And of course a favorite, cause everyone knows one of these, Laquesha sometimes spelt, Laquisha.

A special shout out goes to The Jolie-Pitt household. The childrens names seem to have a lot of consonants found at the end of the alphabet.

No small feat I'm sure:-Maddox, Zahara, Pax, Shiloh, Knox and Vivienne

I'm sorry. I need to stop now. My head is hurting....

Little Bro just trying to fly in peace.

Update on Wolf Boy

Okay. I just can't get this out of my head. Ever since my post on celebrity baby names http://jackedupnames.blogspot.com/2010/07/papa-paparazzi.html , one name in particular has been bouncing around my cerebellum [not that I can actually pronounce it, but you get the gist].

It has also been asked of me whether this name had a ethnic, cultural background.

Yes and No.

Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa

I can't stop thinking about this, so, I wanted to share what other nuggets of info I had dug up.

Do any of you guys remember The Cosby Show? Remember Lisa Bonet? She played Denise Huxtable and was actually a bit of a rebel in the show.
Well...girlfriend changed her name to Lilakoi Moon [not sure when or more importantly ...why!!]

Anyway, she used to be with Lenny Kravitz but now has two kiddies with...wait for it...Jason Momoa!!!!

Jason Momoa
Six kinds of yummy...

Though I give her some serious brownie points for choosing this Baby Daddy...all brownie points become null and void once her youngest son,  Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa, is named.

As Jason is Hawaiian, [eyes involuntarily  flick back to above picture...] the name is supposed to have some of these roots. However, amongst those who speak the language, there is some controversy as to what the name actually means and there are many who think Lisa, I mean, Lilakoi, just totally screwed up the kids name.

Wolf boy and Daddy
He is SOOO cute...
Baby's not bad either...

Okay, so here is what his name is supposed to mean:-
Nakoa (warrior) because he was born on the stormiest, rainy night,
Mana (strength/spirit),
Kaua (rain) and
po (dark).
Namakaeha is Jason's name [sounds like a perfectly reasonable name, but I'm starting to become a little biased re the Momoa man..]
Wolf- We all know what a wolf is...or do we??

Baby Wolf

Baby Wolf

So...the next time I'm at the hospital and hear the joyous though, rambunctious sounds of someone about to pop one out, I will suggest the following names for their offspring:-

Lawe la Waho Keia Manaw

OeKaukeia Ma'ane'i  Maimaupaa'u Hona hou

Lawe-take
la-it
Waho-out
Keia Manaw-now

Oe-you
Kau-put
Keia-this
Ma'ane'i-here
Mai-Don't
Mau-ever
pa-touch
a'u-me
Hona hou-again

Mikomiko- Delicious [this will be used later..You will see...]

Lisa, I mean, Lilakoi looking somewhat perplexed by
 all the baby name fuss.

And just in case you've forgotten who Jason Momoa is...

Well Mahalo to you too, Mr. Mikomiko!!

FINED...for inappropriate keyboard use !!!

Somewhere along the way, some genius discovered that there was more to the keyboard than just the letters, and decided to incorporate that into names. Some may argue that it is almost like an idiot savant of  sorts. Why just use the letters? There is a perfectly good shift key! Why not hit that a couple of times and see what we come up with. Behold...

Le-a

What pray tell is this name I hear you ask? Could it be Lea? Leah? No folks. Wait for it. The name is pronounced [drum roll please...]..LEDASHA !!! Yup! This name is on some poor child's birth certificate. Every time someone comes upon this, ummm, creative use of the dash, she must forcefully reiterate that her name is Ledasha and watch the  horrified comprehension dawn upon that persons face....time and time again...

Apparently every thing on the keyboard is now game...


There is also some poor kid out there who answers to Se7en!

It wasn't bad enough that they were called a number...but apparently the actual number had to be included, to add insult to injury, if you will.

By the way, the parental unit stated that the movie Se7en was in fact their inspiration for this stroke of genius. [To recap. The movie had Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman chasing a serial killer using the seven deadly sins as his MO. Despite my ability to discuss blood, gore and body fluids over any meal...I actually felt quite nauseated by the scenes depicted on the big screen AND to top it off, someone actually loses their head at the end...literally! Good Times!!]

C@ in the H@

The F@ C@ S@ on the M@

Observe the irony of the 'I Can Read Banner'

It has also been recently  brought to my attention, the  reclassification of what we have grown up believing is the apostrophe. Children around the world, whose mother tongue is NOT English have mastered and comprehend the use of the apostrophe. Sadly however, a whole new home grown generation, maybe even someone in your neighbourhood, have taken it upon themselves to rename said punctuation mark.

It is now called, and I presume, it is through ignorance, a "High Comma".

So...L'emonjello [remember him] is spelt out  as..

Capital L... High comma... e..m..o..n..j..e..l..l..o       *Sigh*

Some more examples of this "specialness"

Jai'onna

O'rangello

God'iss Love

Domi’nique

D'janee

A’Laysyn,

D’Kota,

Cam’Ron

D'asia

A moment while I weep...